Fag or Refridgerator

Q: What’s the difference between a fag and a refrigerator?
A: The refrigerator doesn’t fart when you take the meat out.
niiiiice….
(This appeared on popbitch recently, but is as old as the hills so was worth an airing)

statues…

For decades, two heroic statues, one male and one female, faced each other in a city park, until one day an angel came down from heaven.
“You’ve been such exemplary statues,” he announced to them, “That I’m going to give you a special gift. I’m going to bring you both to life for thirty minutes, in [...]

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Are Grrrreat!

Worst computer game ever

I bought the worst computer game ever the other day… Colin McRae’s Helicopter simulator…..
It keeps Crashing…
Sorry Colin!

Victoria Beckham

Not a joke this one… just me being childish.
“I have been busy having a good look around Los Angeles, checking out the restaurants and the beauty parlors – you never know when you might need a facial!”
Apparently Victoria Beckham wants a Facial…. David better get busy!

The big O!

How do you make your wife scream an hour after sex?
Wipe your nob on the curtains

New Renault

Renault have just announced a new family car with boot space large enough to fit a small child…. introducing….
The Renault McCann!

do ya like dags?

What has 4 legs and one arm?
A Doberman in a playground…

Sarah Silverman Mocks Britney Spears

Tasteless fave and Pinup (ish) Sarah Silverman rips it out of Britney Spears and some others at the Mtv Video Music Awards (VMA)

Check the shizzle out….
Edit…. Youtube video is much better… so click it again… bitches.

Big words!

A guy comes home from work and finds his girlfriend on their bed, crying.
He asks his girlfriend “what’s wrong?”
She looks at him and says in disgust, “I know the truth about you…” she sobs and continues, “I know
you’re a PEDOPHILE!” The man walks up to her and hugs her, then he says..
“Honey, I’m so proud [...]

Diana and the McCann’s in one Joke!

What’s the difference between Madeleine McCann and Princess Diana?
Only two people saw Madeleine’s burial.
found at www.sickipedia.org
Loverly.

Pavarotti Joke

I was saddened to hear of the passing of operatic legend Pavarotti today.
My thoughts and sympathies go to his family and coffin bearers.

jesus?

What’s the difference between real Jesus and a picture of Jesus?
It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.

Does that fit?

Whats blue and dosnt fit?
A dead epileptic.

Princess die?

I was going to post a Princess Diana joke up today (in usual tasteless fashion)  seeing as its the 10 year anniversary, however after trawling my own imagination and the wonders of Google, I’m struggling to find anything of any substance.
Best one I’ve heard so far is…
What do you buy the princess who has everything?
An [...]

Whats…

Black and Screams?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

Ive decided that….

That there are not enough Michael Jackson Jokes on this site… so here is one to get me started.
You remember when Michael Jackson held his kid over the balcony, bit weird wasn’t it…
I though he usually tossed kids off!

Cinderella…

What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She gagged.

The King?

What would Elvis be doing if he was still alive?
Banging on the inside of his coffin…

What’s?

What’s twelve inches long… hard… and makes a grown woman cry….
COT DEATH!
Thankyou to Celebrityscraps.wordpress.com for that one